Return of the Deetschei

Alright, first things first. Don might be attaining nirvana for his knee right now, but you do need to know that there is another, mortal, running source of strength for those of you in need:



Not yet deified, when I'm not busy conspiring to hide gnostic secrets about Jesus getting jiggy with it, I have been known to run a lap or two around the cathedral. In white loafers.

(Note: Requests for pictures of a running pope have not been ignored. We're just waiting to wash the costume. I can not stress how gross it smells. If you imagine rolling around in a Bourbon Street gutter for five days, then just pouring two beers over your head for fun...you would be half way there. I couldn't put the outfit on without passing out right now)

I expected Karneval to really wipe out the progress I made over the past two months, but it apparently had some reinvigorating, super-hero like effect on me. I managed to run through some of the pain, so I never actually dropped a week. The overall miles naturally dropped from the 20 mile week I logged just before, but I was able to tread water until we got to London for some much needed detox. It turns out that the wrong side of the road is the fast side of the road:

My best (non-weekend) run in the week leading up to and including Karneval, in terms of speed and overall feel, was a 4.09 mile run for 34:01, which worked out to a 8:19 pace. I was totally ecstatic with that. Then, however, things started getting faster (dare I say, ass-kickinger?). For the past two weeks, my average time has dropped below 8 minute miles on almost every run. I bettered my 4 mile time to 33:25, then 31:13, and finally 30:51! (AND, I need to add, the Nike + needs to be calibrated again which means I'm running further than I need, so I'm actually doing even better than the times suggest...it's minimal, but I need to get that out there...I'm such a petty little pope.) Honestly, if I were a high school track coach and I needed to prepare my team for a meet in two weeks, I would have a hard time not taking them to Tijuana for a few days of drunken debauchery. The results speak for themselves.

Anyway, last week culminated with this run on Sunday:




It was relatively relaxed and I didn't need to thrust my hips too far in any one direction to sustain the pace, although I did make air-humping motions occcasionally to embaress Tessa, but I do that anyway. ;) Again, I had to run around the block an extra time just to get the iPod to register the six miles, so I actually finished in under 46 minutes. Not only that, but during that run I registered my fastest mile (7:26) and established my fastest 5K pace (23:48)! I figure I should be in good position for Bay to Breakers, Cologne Edition...However, those of us who can't make it to the actual race but who are running in satellite cities really should settle on goal times that take into account a lack of Hayes Street Hill. How much difference do you think it makes?

Last, but not least, I've started training for a Half Marathon in late April. I'm using the Intermediate Ultimate Half Marathon Plan from Runners World. It's going to be hectic, but I'm trying to beat my PB by at least 5 minutes. I must be nuts.

The Week So Far (includes runs with Tessa, she's getting faster too!):

Distance: 12.95 Miles
Time: 1:45
Average: 8:06 per mile


Overall Impression: Binge Drinking Make For Faster Pope (BDMFFP)

UPDATE: For those of you that are a little frustrated right now, I'm linking to a post of mine from October when I couldn't finish 2 miles without A LOT of pain here. And I would like to point out that my (then) estimate of needing a month to be able to log 20 miles in a week was off. I couldn't manage it until February! Running is just a world of heartbreak sometimes. But there's always reason for hope!